Tag: aspergers

It’s time to let go of the bengollow.com domain.

I know I have had this domain for years but I think it’s time to let go of a domain that I don’t even refer to anymore. I will still keep bgollow.com.au for now however I’m not sure if I’ll let this expire too along with the hosting. The problem is no one leaves comments on my site anymore and I hardly have the encouragement to post here anymore because of it. It’s just like another cost of mine where I have a gym membership but I hardly use it. Unfortunately I can’t cancel that until the end of this year because it would just be a bigger waste in itself.

I’ve came to realize that I keep trying to do everything but I can’t. It’s better for me to just have a rest than be going out all the time. I always feel tired and I use that excuse for not going to the gym. A have a friend that became a PT last year but he’s so busy with placements he doesn’t really have time to be there for me every week to motivate me. I’m not keen on the idea of getting a personal trainer and paying for them when I already pay enough for a gym membership. Honestly I wished I never signed up for 2 years at the start of the new year last year. We all know that new year’s resolutions don’t always get completed or even started.

My main reason behind joining the gym was to get fitter and gain muscle but that has seem to gone out of the window and I can’t be bothered going to a gym. I can understand my mate being busy with placements for uni and everything else but it’s making me not that interested in going to the gym. Has anyone tried going to a gym, then gets bored of it and stops going? I don’t even have a eating plan and I reckon I should have something because I’m getting bored of ham, tomato and cheese sandwiches for work lunches.

Even TAFE seems like a struggle for me. I just don’t seem to get some things and find it really hard to research information on it. I want to receive another award this year but I’m not sure if I’ll get one. I’m just hopeless when it comes to theory work as I’m just a practical worker. It doesn’t help that I feel bored doing the same things over and over again. I just wish I could do something new, yeah I’m not like other people with aspergers.

The only thing that bothers me having aspergers is that I tend to not think before I post something on a social network and then I get the occasional Facebook user replying with smiley faces. I tend to take a lot of things to heart when I read them however no one can make me cry. I just end up feeling like crap.

Hence the holiday back in January wasn’t that relaxing as I thought it would be. Yeah I met a whole lot of new people that I probably won’t speak to again. Especially the ones that removed me from Facebook as soon as the tour ended! Having to get up like I’m still working is crazy. It didn’t help with me taking time off before I went when I should’ve done that after I got back (at least I know for next time). It wasn’t really a relaxing holiday until I got home. However it was a great experience into the Australian outback. Unfortunately Darwin wasn’t what I expected it to be but I guess I went there at the wrong time of the year, their “Wet Season”.

Over time I’ve been here trying to make blog posts but I keep deleting them. If there’s anything you would like to see again from my previous websites/blog posts or something new, please suggest it in the comments. It’s the only thing that will keep this blog up and running.

I CAN camp

Two weekends ago I went on a social┬ácamp to Malmsbury with a whole lot of other people on the spectrum. I’ve been on a camp like this last year but I have to admit it’s improved a lot from the food and the balance between speeches and activities. There were still a few dramas like last year but everyone seemed to cope a lot better this time than last year. Continue reading


Well you may have thought I was extinct from the web and was never going to come back. Instead I’ve been so busy with work and my personal life on the weekends that I wasn’t able to post anything. So let’s go back to the start of April. I ended up at a golf course. At first I didn’t seem to enjoy the job. Not that I would quit or anything. Just that it was a complete change from working in the Hort Services like looking after local parks and streetscapes with other people to working on my own on more than 18 garden beds pulling out gum trees. I was just expecting to be doing more than just pulling out gum trees. Although the next task was pulling out weeds in which it took me almost half an hour to pull out a massive weed. During this time golfers have asked me if I could turn up at their place and do their gardens. One even suggested that I was growing a secret stash of “weed” in the garden beds and was harvesting it. As if I would do that though I’m not interested in helping out in strangers gardens either. Like I even up so tired that I can’t even do my garden anymore and weekends is when I spend time out with friends. So basically the garden could end up like a rain forest if I’m in charge looking after it. But no, I’ll probably end up doing it sometime lol.

Continue reading

Going golf balls.

Well the past weeks have been quite interesting ones. Firstly I ended up receiving an “achievement” award for my Certificate II in Horticulture and Certificate II in Conservation & Land Management. The night was great until I noticed that a past employer was mentioned in the booklet of who’s getting an award. It happens that I didn’t get on well with this employer and was shocked that they received an award for Employer of the Year, but I guess my TAFE didn’t know what happened behind closed doors. Continue reading


You probably thought I was mentioning Charlie Sheen in the title, well you’re wrong. Lately I have been winning a couple of things like an Australian domain (still not 100% sure on what to call it) along with a years worth of hosting, a GPS with speed detection and a $150 fuel voucher. Some people have been saying I should enter the lottery, but I’ve never gambled in my life though I guess it’s something that I should try.

I’ve just been out way too much that I’ve been spending a lot though I have been enjoying it. Continue reading


Well I have been pretty busy lately as you may have noticed. A month ago I just finished TAFE at Holmesglen leaving with a Certificate II in Horticulture and a Certificate II in Conservation & Land Management. On the last day of TAFE we had a class BBQ that was a good way to end the course. One thing I learned though TAFE is a bit like school. Continue reading

Flying golf balls.

First I better say sorry for writing so late but I just got busy. It’s probably because I have been working at a golf course this whole week and it’s been really fun. I honestly thought it wouldn’t be that good for me but it was even though I did a couple of mistakes like blowing leaves into the bunkers and driving over the greens. Heck, I don’t even know how golf works. Continue reading

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